Such a long time since I last blogged

Ah, such a long time since I last blogged.

Not really blogging about anything in particular today other than maybe erm... Citibank shares? Wahaha.

Yes, I must say I succumbed and bought into the share fever especially when the Citibank shares hit that all time low of less than USD1. I wish I had more cash on hand to buy more though... Now that prices are about USD3, I could have made 3 times the amount of cash to buy my coveted LV pieces... Unfortunately, with a baby boy on the way, I'm afraid the LV niceties have gotta make way for the more important nappies.

Well, having hitched on the bandwagon somewhat late, I guess the only way now is to wait. Colleagues at the Clan indicate that we should all wait for the Q1 profit and loss results to be out. If its bad, buy more shares... if its great, time to sell sell sell...

Hopefully my Citibank shares can sell for a good price... I wanna get a new house... wahaha!!!

I think I must be kinda nuts... hit by a mega Barbie doll/The Sims fever. I've simply had too much fun running around getting the right stuff to decorate the new place but now that its done, I've started to feel bored again.

I realise that staying at home is probably not the thing for me. Much as I love to do nothing and have cash keep rolling in everyday, I honestly find it rather boring to be stuck at home and doing nothing constructive.

It might be a good idea to entertain myself by starting an online business the way AH has done. Unfortunately I am just lazy... Haha!

Recently, I have been thinking about Edinburgh quite a bit. I wonder whether the flowers along Princes have opened again? Or is it still too chilly, I wonder? Sigh, honestly I would very much like to bring a lappy, grab my Gucci and head out to the airport with my passport wrapped in LV. Then, I would get a ticket to go.. I dunno anywhere would be fine... maybe Hong Kong? Doesn't have to be far... but again with bb on the way, DH just doesn't think flying should be my thing.

I haven't visited Italy yet.. I think Milan and maybe Sicily would be nice in Summer. Another cuppa in Laduree in Paris would also be a good fix.... The closest thing I''ve had to that was breakfast at Delifrance on my birthday... wahaha.. somehow that felt very nice.

Ah... miss NC who is currently in Taiwan... I guess she should be headed back to Scots soon... Hmmm the Damier Neverfull is hitting the UK soon... damn... maybe I should ask LT to help me buy and i pay him back.. it should make a fantastic baby diaper bag... LOL

I feel really really down...

I have to admit it.. I am feeling really really down...

I mean, its not like I don't like my job or that I've got nothing to do or whatever.. it's just a feeling of despair... boredom... and a craving to get out and go on a nice long leave.

Honestly, I don't have to travel to Milan or Paris to go shopping... I just want to get out of Singapore... its terrible the way things are now since its just absolute boredom that attempts to drown me.

It's not that my job isn't challenging but I feel that my life has come to a point whereby I just want to go for a nice long holiday by myself and do nothing but laze in a nice cafe having breakfast, maybe enjoy the fresh morning air and then spend the afternoon at some Parisian style cafe sipping chamomile tea and eating a lemon slice or something.

Even shopping bores me! Can you believe it? I actually find myself not enjoying the spoils of my purchases the way I used to. Maybe its cos' I am using my own money.. maybe it's cos my hubby stopped buying me christmas, birthday and valentine's gifts? Whatever it is, I find myself spending money like water but yet derive little satisfaction from it.

I know its just me. I am not exactly burned out, but I lost motivation and drive somewhere along the way again. I find myself lying awake at night unable to sleep, but also find myself unable to wake in the morning.

I sometimes feel like crying and also like laughing out loud. I find myself shedding tears of depression, but also tears of jubilance. Maybe I am going nuts by going in circles trying to find something that will make me not so bored, but ultimately not succeeding other than to continually bore myself with trying to find ways not to be so bored.

Then again, I think I have found my answer. I hate long drawn out processes because yes, they bore me to death. I hate having to have a single letter vetted by 10 pairs of eyes. I hate having to wait for 9 months before my baby comes out. I dread the prospect of having to stay in Singapore for the next 10 years until my baby grows old enough to understand the world and what it potentially holds. I dread the next 3 months while I wait for baby to grow. I repel the idea of having to stay in Singapore for the next 3 months and not being able to go away for a nice long holiday in Korea or Japan or wherever.

I just hate it. So damn hate it. I want to be able to take leave and fly away for a full month and go appreciate the shopping culture of Milan, bask in the warm subshine of Sicily and maybe spend a week in rainy Scotland visiting my son's Godma.

Oh yes, and I hate the prospect of having to save every single cent and scrimp for my son's education and well-being... I'd honestly rather be saving Singapore's economy by splurging on some branded luxury that I probably don't need.

Arghh I hate this life.. so utterly utterly boring... somebody just kill me... before this drawn out process does